Delving into the past....to look for my future

Today was another day hard at work tidying the clutter in my external life.  It actually marked the end of a very drawn out process that began last week, hitting a high point yesterday when I finally completed my 2009-2010 tax return, and finished today with a cull of the filing cabinet.  My shredder has never worked so hard in it's life!  I came across a stash of very old letters - including some interesting (and embarrassing) ones from past loves - which led me to reflect on where I am today.

Interestingly, I discovered in one of letters that I was doubting my long term desire to be a nurse, even before I had finished uni!  But, even today, when people ask me what I would like to do as an alternative, I cannot put my finger on a satisfactory answer.  I was adamant after completing my disastrous work experience in Year 10 (will not name the facility other than it was a private hospital in the eastern suburbs of Melb) - where I spent the entire two weeks filing and brushing false teeth (but not at the same time haha) - that there was no way I was going to be a nurse, nor be involved in health care in way whatsoever.

I entertained ideas about journalism - I still love current affairs and the like - but I wasn't particularly gifted when it came to putting down my thoughts into the written word.  Unlike now you all may say.  Loved reading - and still do - but writing reviews and essays didn't exactly 'rock my boat' so an average B - C student in English I became.  Not good enough for a career in the field.

But, after reading a "course" of letters from a long-term boyfriend at the time, I can track the progress of my decision to enter nursing.  I won't go into the details other than to say my resolve not to nurse slowly dissipated over time and was replaced by a strong desire to do so - supported very strongly by my beau who was considering a similar career path for himself (he ended up becoming an upholsterer instead - don't ask me how or why?).

Of course, when I started uni it was easy to get into the swing of things and I found I actually enjoyed it far more than I thought 2 years previously.  The career suited my personality type - a people pleaser and a carer.  And here I am 20 years later (far out that makes me feel old!), my nursing registration still current but finally looking outside the "square" of traditional nursing / nursing management.  I am facing my future (again)...